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Saturday, July 9, 2011

What Can You Do About Visitation?

What Can You Do About Visitation?

            In many cases I see, a Parenting Plan has been entered, sometimes many years ago, and it just isn’t working anymore.  Kids get older, and the conflict between a child’s growing independence and the need to spend time with a parent can become a real source of disagreement.  One or both parents’ jobs may have evolved, and the timing for the visits in the Parenting Plan may become unworkable.  People move, and even relatively small increases in distance can effect the viability of scheduled visits.

            Washington law provides for modification of Parenting Plans, but the process can be difficult if both parents aren’t on board for the proposed changes.  It is often easier to just let the old Parenting Plan stay in place, but the result can be less and less time with the child and the possibility of a loss of a close relationship with the child.  It is important to have a useful and adaptive Parenting Plan that address the importance of maintaining the parent child relationship, and trying to the relationship work with an out of date Order is difficult at best. 

            If the original Parenting Plan was adopted when the child was young, there may not have been provisions for bigger blocks of time with the child.  As kids get older, it might be appropriate to divide the Summer vacation between the parents.  While this might not have worked at age 2, at age 8 it could be a real option.  Spending bigger blocks of time with the child can help reinforce and build a stronger bond between the parent and child.

            Whether you are just looking to “tweak” the current Parenting Plan, or you need a more comprehensive modification, it is far better to take action now than delay.  As a general rule of thumb, the longer you allow the visitation to remain inadequate or unworkable, the more difficult it can be to make a change.

            If you are able to discuss your issues with the other parent, and many parents can, an agreed modification can be done quite easily.  Mediation can often be used to resolve differences without resorting to open warfare.  If needed, the courts will be willing to resolve differences.  Regardless of the appropriate approach, your time with your child is fleeting, and each year that goes by without a workable Parenting Plan can never be replaced.